“It is not going to be easy,” the 37-year-old star exclusively told Us Weekly on Monday, November 8, while promoting Lifetime’s The Holiday Fix Up. “I can honestly barely talk about it without getting emotional. It’s going to be rough.”

The One Tree Hill alum filed for divorce from Caussin, 34, in April after five years of marriage. Three months later, they finalized the divorce with Kramer getting custody of their two children, Jolie, 5, and Jace, 2, for 240 days a year and Caussin getting 125 days. On Monday, the Dancing With the Stars alum revealed that she has the kids on Christmas Eve.

“Next year I can’t even think about not having them on Christmas Eve night. Instead of, kind of, future tripping, I’m like, ‘OK, just take it day by day,’” Kramer told Us, noting that she is focused on giving her kids an “amazing holiday” no matter what’s going on between her and the former NFL player.

The “I Got the Boy” singer admitted that the holidays are “going to be the hardest of the seasons to go through” post-split.

“I’m looking forward to it, but I’m scared of it too,” she explained, telling Us that some of her family’s traditions will continue. “I want to do some of the same things that we’ve always done with the kids, which is like they [bake] cookies and decorate the tree together and open one gift on Christmas Eve.”

The Michigan native plans to add a few new activities to her holiday checklist as well.

“I need to find something that is just us — that I haven’t done from years [past],” Kramer said, adding that she has been “emotional” just thinking about putting up decorations and being cheerful in the wake of the divorce. “I remember seeing the first Christmas lights and, in my head, I was like, ‘Shoot, here we are.’ It made me sad.”

The Soccer Mom Madam actress recalled talking to Jennie Garth about her current aversion to putting up lights, telling her it could “depress” her. However, the Beverly Hills, 90210 alum, 49, told Kramer to put her feelings aside.

“[Jennie was] like, ‘You do it for the kids.’ And [I said], ‘Oh, my gosh, I didn’t even think about that,’” Kramer explained. “So now it’s, like, I want to create something that’s really special for us three. Just our little special memory and special tradition that we do together as a family of three. I don’t know what it is yet, but I’m trying to think of it.”

In addition to planning out Christmas with her kids, Kramer has been focused on her acting career — specifically her latest movie, The Holiday Fix Up, which premieres next month.

“It was so much fun to do. It was awesome to be able to be an executive producer on it and really like, get my hands on it,” the actress told Us of the project, which also stars Ryan McPartlin and Maria Menounos. “We were really able to, like, make it as organic as we can, but still using the formula that everyone loves for those Lifetime movies.”

The Holiday Fix Up premieres on Lifetime Saturday, December 11 at 8 p.m. ET. It will also be available to steam on demand and on MyLifetime.com starting Sunday, December 12.

With reporting by Christina Garibaldi

This story originally appeared on: US Magazine - Author:Johnni Macke