‘Endings, Beginnings’ movie review: A boring on-screen Instagram filter

When it comes to the movie “Endings, Beginnings,” I prefer the endings.

But, goodness gracious, it takes an eternity to get there. This bore fest is nearly two hours of sizzle-less romance and thudding dialogue, centered around the sort of obnoxious free spirit who’d start up an unwanted conversation with you at a bar.

Her name is Daphne (Shailene Woodley). She is in her early 30s, speaks in breathy whispers and makes scream-at-the-screen life decisions. Caught in a crisis spurred by a trauma, she abandons her job and her relationship and commits to celibacy and sobriety. That nun routine lasts about five minutes.

Daphne moves in with her sister who has a pool, and tries to reinvent herself. But before you can say Grey Goose, she meets two hot best friends and decides to date them both at the same time. They drink, smoke and have surface-level conversations.

“It didn’t feel right being alone,” she tells a concerned confidant. “It didn’t feel right not exploring both of these people.” Duh, they’re played by Sebastian Stan and Jamie Dornan!

Jack (Dornan) is a sensitive, responsible professor and Frank (Stan) is an appealing rebel you can’t rely on. Both are scruffy. And, while it’s not a shock that a woman would want to get to know two smoldering men who are obsessed with her, it’s not very nice of Daphne to wedge herself between two best friends in the name of exploration, like a sexually frustrated Columbus.

Woodley, who was the least remarkable member of the “Big Little Lies” cast, strains to be naturalistic, delivering lines like colorless afterthoughts. Stan and Dornan perform their assigned task well enough.

Director and co-writer Drake Doremus lends his film an Instagram-filtered look throughout, and its tone is resultantly vapid. Much of the story is also told through onscreen texting conversations with Jack and Frank, who Daphne adds into her phone as “Suffer Buddy.” I couldn’t help but feel like this film’s own suffer buddy.